The sky has been cloudy and dark in my world for a while now, but things are starting to lighten up. I haven't posted to my blog since the fire at Osborne's in October. It seemed that things were going from bad to worse. September brought Katie's drowning at Wolf Lake. November brought Lori's son's suicide. I was afraid it was going to get worse, so I didn't write. I guess that's a writer's block of sorts.

It's Christmas Eve eve and I'm feeling a tiny bit optimistic that things may be getting better. I hope this season of "Peace on Earth" applies to my world. God knows I'm ready for some!

Then, there's the New Year. Despite the gloom and doom preached by the economists, I'm blessed to have a secure job with benefits and a salary that allows me to afford my mortgage. My heart breaks for those families going through foreclosure. Many of them bit off more than they could chew, and in many cases, they were manipulated to fail and didn't know it.

I'm also hopeful that our new president will deliver on his promises to make our country better. I do, however, worry that the people who elected him will forget what their responsibility is in all this. It really is up to us to hold Washington accountable for the choices they make and the actions they take. It is a time for change which will require that all of us work very hard and watch out for each other if we're to make it happen!

Someone once said that "there is no key to happiness. The door is always open." I think that's true. Very true. And, my Christmas wish is that others will know that, too!

The north side entrance, where customers parked
and entered Osborne's.

The back of the building.
A fire fighter chased me back behind the yellow line.



Osborne's Hardware Store caught on fire last week
and this is all that's left.

It's kind of hard to imagine downtown Davie without Osborne's. And, that's just what we said two years ago when they closed down. The family still owns the property, but they moved the store to New Smyrna Beach. They couldn't take the overcrowded highways and impersonal attitudes of the people who were moving into the area. Which is totally understandable.

This is a family that opened their business in the 1950s during a time when there wasn't much more in Davie than their hardware business, a grocery store, a couple of offices, a feed store and a multitude of orange packing houses and dairy farms. In that era of south Florida's development, traveling from Fort Lauderdale to Davie was a day long trip. It was a different time and Davie was a different place.

I know the Osborne's. Cindy Osborne and her husband opened the business way back when. Her daughter, Cindy Lou, ran it up until the time it closed and she was assisted by her daughter, Kimberly. They offered all manner of hardware and specialized in those things you couldn't find at Home Depot or Lowe's.

I know things change. But, do they have to change like this?

Katie & Mike at the Key West Conference, July 2007

Mike & Katy, one afternoon last winter.

She was all dressed up, looking so pretty!

Mike & Katy --- Katy was the best Teddy, the Turtle, I ever had!

Last week was one of the longest weeks of my life. I know it sounds harsh, but it’s the truth: it was a week of death.

It started on Saturday, September 20. I got a phone call at home that my boss’s 19-year-old daughter had drowned. To say it was a shock is truly an understatement. It blew my mind. The first thing I did after that phone call ended was to call my own 21-year-old daughter at college and make sure she was alright. She was fine and I counted my blessings.

Monday, the 22nd was the twentieth anniversary of a life-altering experience. On that day in 1988 my beloved husband stabbed a young man because he thought the boy was my lover. He wasn’t. He was a friend of my then-18-year-old daughter.

The police took my husband away to jail and emergency medical technicians took the boy to Broward General where they misdiagnosed his three stab wounds. By the time they discovered their mistake, the boy was brain dead. In Florida, the law required he be connected to life support for 72 hours, so the family held vigil while we all prayed for a miracle.

Wednesday, September 24 of this year, my boss’s daughter’s funeral was held. I never saw so many people, young and old, paying their respects to her memory. There were photographs of her all over the funeral home and as I sat in the midst of this crowd, I was overwhelmed with grief, old and new, at the loss of these young lives filled with so much promise. Now, as then, I could not make any sense out of the randomness of it all. Why her? Why him? They were so young! They had their entire lives in front of them! Why? Why? Why?

On Friday, the 26th, I was feeling downright morose. It was on this day, twenty years earlier, that a beautiful young man was allowed to quietly leave this world for the next. And, an entire new chapter unfolded for me and my family. A chapter filled with depositions, court hearings, trials and sentences. It would be another three years before I would find any semblance of normalcy in my life.

Today, as I look back on last week’s events, including two anniversaries and a funeral, I am struck by their similarity. While one was a crime and one was a horrible accident, the pain that follows that kind of loss must be nothing short of torture for the parents, family and friends of the departed.

They may never know, but I pray for all of them, every day.

I wish I could do more.

NOTE: I liked taking pictures of Katy & Mike. It was clear that they loved each other and enjoyed their relationship as Dad & Daughter. I'll miss seeing Katy. Especially with her dad.

There can't be much to say about this day of remembrance, except to remember where I was at the time this occurred. I was sitting on the foot of my bed, brushing my teeth as I readied myself to go to work at Old Fort Lauderdale when the first plane hit. I was watching the Today Show and Katie Couric and Matt Lauer, with very somber faces, announced that a plane had crashed into one of the twin towers. A split screen had Matt and Katie on the right and the single burning tower on the left.

Another plane ran into the second tower and exploded. As millions of people watched on their TVs, just like me. I stopped brushing my teeth. And, said out loud, to my dog, " This is no accident." I sat there on the foot of my bed, toothbrush in one hand, crossed legs completely still, glued to the images on the TV for about two minutes. Then it hit me. I spoke, to no one in particular, not even my dog. "There's going to be a whole lot of people who are gonna go through what I went through." That was what I thought about in that moment. The senseless, stupid loss of a loved one was going to pervade the lives of who knew how many people... I know this because I've been there. I've had my entire life turned upside down in a split second because of the stupid, senseless choice of another human being.

For me, it's been almost twenty years. For the victim's families of 9/11, it's only been seven years. While time does make it easier to bear, time doesn't erase the hurt. I'm not sure anything ever does. Meanwhile, we must keep on dancing, doing whatever it takes to survive.

Sarah Palin's Hair

They say the best offense is a good defense, so let me begin with a defensive remark: I am not attacking feminism or women's place in the world. I think we have just as much right to be president or vice president as any man. I know men and women think differently, but we have way more in common than we have different. Of this much, I am certain!

With that touchy issue out of the way, I've gotta tell ya' ... Alaska Governor Sarah Palin, the Republican Vice Presidential Candidate, needs to do something about her hair. It was the first thing that struck me about her appearance when she began appearing on the web and on TV last week after McCain released her name ... here was a lovely woman dressed as a professional right down to the eyeglasses, and her hair looked like an afterthought. Twisted up and clipped as though it were too much work to pin it up in a bun or french braid it or (Gasp!) wear it down and loose around her shoulders. Puh-leeeeze! C'mon, girl! Get with it!

I googled her photos and sorted through whatever came up, and photo after photo looks like the one you see here. Not polished. Not stylish. Not presidential at all. I didn't write anything though. I started thinking about writing on Sunday and Monday, but I said to meself, "No. Wait. Let her make her convention speech. See how she looks then."

So, I waited. And, what a disappointment. Oh, her speech was good. I'll give her that. But, her hair didn't look the least bit presidential. Sorry, kids. It really is an important issue for a woman executive. Appearance speaks volumes. I remember Annette, from the Mickey Mouse Club, singing the song about "beauty is as beauty does." A woman who doesn't take time with her hair may not take time with other things that are of importance to me, the average, ordinary American citizen.

The stylists are arguing that Palin might be a 'little too long in the tooth' for those tresses of hers, sparking yet another ongoing discussion among middle aged women: to cut or not to cut after hitting 40. Yes, long hair evokes youth, but long hair after 40 flirts with desperation.

Last night's speech, while inspiring and clearly targeted at her opponent, rang hollow. If it was me, and I was addressing the Republican National Convention just to lead the Pledge of Allegiance, I wouldn've gotten a haircut (or trim) and a professional styling. If she did get one or both of those things, I couldn't tell. Yeah, yeah! Her hair was down, but it didn't look presidential to me at all! And, if the truth be known, I want my President to look like The President of the United States of America. Pure and simple!

I'll be watching to see what she does next. And, I'll be listening very carefully to her and her new buddy, John McCain. They surprised me once. Let's see if they can do it again!

In The Pink ...

I've been looking through my photographs from the last couple of years, and I stumbled on this one. I had forgotten all about it until I saw it again, then I remembered ...

I am really bad about taking pictures from the car. I know it's so declasse for "photographers" to do that, but I just can't help myself. When I see something I like, I want to capture the image and keep it!

I remember taking this one well, because it was such a surprise find. My darling husband and I were in Miami, just sort of wandering around, and when we came around the corner, POOF! There was this pink Volkswagen and a pink building and I grabbed the camera and did a point and shoot! And, here's what I got!

I like it ... I hope you do, too!

My friend, Janet ...

Yesterday I spent a few hours with an old friend. We had a wonderfully fresh lunch at Mango's on Las Olas Boulevard followed by a personally guided tour through the Museum of Art where my friend is among the winners of the South Florida Cultural Consortium Fellowship for Visual and Media Artists... for the second time...

Once we'd completed our tour, we were off to her studio which is hidden in a warehouse district just south of the FEC railroad tracks. She had just acquired a huge collection of art and papers from the recently deceased mother of a friend the night before our meeting and it was a reverent yet delightful experience to see and touch this woman's things as Janet poured over them, sorting them into piles. There was a small plastic bag filled with cut-out egg shapes, each one with a random series of numbers typed in the center of the egg. Janet says that "obsessive compulsive" artists are the latest trend. The eggs are proof that these people exist, but I'll be very curious to see how she uses them in her collages.

She had nine of her pieces on exhibit at the Museum of Art and what I liked most about her work is its simplicity of design and sense of history that holds each piece together. One revealed an ancient, moldy book spine combined with a piece of an old envelope while another contained a rusty shape she'd scavenged from a dumpster somewhere. These objects would be totally meaningless if they'd been left as they were, but in the hands of this amazing artist, they are transformed to something else ... something that is all about design.

I enjoyed my amazing day and send many thanks to my friend, Janet Gold. We don't see each other as often as I'd like, but when we are together, it's always inspirational to me and way too much fun!