Monday, July 2, 2012

How it began ... (the story, that is)


It was almost 7:30 as Marley raced out the door, her arms laden with handbag, camera bag and briefcase. She jokingly referred to herself as a bag lady. She loaded the stuff into the back seat of her car, got into the driver's seat, retrieved her water bottle from her purse and placed it in the cup holder, then slipped the key into the ignition of her Saturn Ion, cranking the car to go.  It was a quiet morning and no one was on the street. She usually saw Peggy from across the street, or Lou from the corner house, out walking their dogs at this time of day, so Marley figured they were running behind this morning. She chuckled to herself as she pulled into the street, heading west toward Andrews Avenue. “Aren’t we all running behind?” she said aloud.

Marley’s place was located in an old Florida neighborhood with an eclectic mix of houses and multi-family homes; McMansions from the recent real estate boom and suburban homes from the 1940s mixed with larger cookie cutter houses built in the late 1970s. There was no direct route, so Marley had to wend her way through the narrow streets until she reached the traffic signal at Andrews and 21st Court. She looked north and south and saw no traffic at all, and, as she wondered how long she’d have to wait for what she considered the longest light in Broward County, she heard the click of the pedestrian crosswalk sign flashing red. Twenty seconds later, the light changed to green.

Marley turned south onto Andrews and drove her usual route … west on 13th Street, south on 7th Avenue, then west on Sunrise Boulevard. After seven years of driving to and from work in Davie, some 15 miles south and west of her home, she’d uncovered the quickest and least stressful routes and kept them to herself. There were a few things she was private about, and her travel route was one of those things. She didn't need all those extra cars clogging up her journey back and forth to work.
   
As she pulled up to the traffic signal at Seventh and Sunrise, the first thing she noticed was the BP station on the corner looked like it was closed. It was a 24-hour station and that seemed odd for a Thursday. Again, there was no traffic. Marley looked east before turning onto Sunrise, and as the car’s speed increased, she began to realize something wasn’t right. There were no cars on Sunrise Boulevard at 7:40 AM on a weekday morning. There was no traffic coming from downtown Fort Lauderdale. No buses. She turned on the radio, winding the knob to increase the sound. It was on a light station and Katy Perry was singing about fireworks.

She ran the red light at Powerline Road after she slowed to look both ways. No traffic anywhere. She pushed her speed up to 65 and blew through the school zone’s flashing yellow light and another traffic signal. The crossing guard was absent. No pedestrians on the street. No cars in Burger King’s drive thru. When she reached the I-95 overpass, she pulled into the left turn lane, put the car in “park” and left it running while she got out. She walked across four lanes of traffic and looked down onto I-95 southbound. Not a car or truck or motorcycle anywhere, north or south bound. All she could hear was the traffic signal changing. The airport located to the south was quiet and the skies were empty. She knew there were planes taking off and landing all day long because the airport served 23 million passengers a year. But, there were no planes anywhere.

Tri-Rail runs on the west side and parallel to I-95, and Marley watched, knowing the trains ran every 20 minutes.  She waited.

Three minutes passed and no train. Marley walked back to her car and fished around in her glove box, locating a pack of cigarettes. She found the lighter, lit her smoke and grabbed her cell phone, walking back across the road. Still no train. Still no cars. Anywhere. She stood and smoked and tried to decide if she was dreaming or if this was real.

The heat of the sun, now fully up, was real. She felt a light wind coming from the ocean to the east. The smoke in her lungs as she inhaled was real.

She listened. The only sound came from the traffic signals changing from green to yellow to red. She remembered how quiet it had been when she sailed to the Dry Tortugas those many years ago and said out loud, “What the fuck?” She looked at her watch. It was now 7:53 AM and still no train.

She swiped her smart phone and found her husband’s cell number. He was running the Swiffer around the kitchen when she left and she hoped he wasn’t already in the shower. He picked up on the second ring.

“Carl.”

“What?”

“Carl. Something’s wrong.”

“What?” She could hear the concern in his voice. Him thinking she’d been in a wreck.

“There’s no traffic.”

“Well. Good.” He waited.

She waited.

She turned and looked north, to see if a train or vehicle was anywhere in sight. “Carl, there are no cars on the road.” She took a breath.  “ Anywhere.”

“What?” This time his voice sounded like he didn’t understand what she said.

“There are no cars on the road anywhere. I haven’t seen another car or person since I left the house.”

She was waiting to wake up.

He didn’t respond. Why didn’t he respond? “Carl.”

“What?” Now he sounded irritated.

“Carl, get in your car and drive up here to Sunrise at I-95. Now.”

“I’m not dressed,” he said. Carl is very particular about his appearance and would never dream of leaving the house without being fully dressed.

“Carl, put on some jeans and shoes and drive up here! NOW!” She felt the tension rising.

“Let me take a shower.”

“No! Now, Carl! NOW!” Now she was yelling into the phone.

She heard the disconnect and clicked her phone off. She went back to her car, got in, turned the air conditioner on high and turned up the volume on the radio. The light channel was now playing an old Simon & Garfunkle tune. “Sounds of Silence.”  “How appropriate,” Marley muttered to herself. She kept hitting the scan key. The Rolling Stones on the oldies station.  Then, silence on the Spanish station. Silence on NPR. Beethoven on the classical music station. Silence, again, on another Spanish station. She hit the scan button to return to the light music station. Simon and Garfunkle were still singing. She waited. The song ended. She waited for the commercial or the disc jockey to give a traffic report or something. Just silence.

 “I must be dreaming. This can’t be real.”

She pulled out another cigarette and fired it up. She rolled the window down a bit and located her brother’s phone number on her cell. She hit the call button, inhaled the smoke and waited. It went to voice mail.

She hit the end button and searched for her office number. She hit the call button and put the phone to her ear. The phone rang five times and then she heard the answering machine with Cindy’s voice. “You have reached …” She hung up.

She got back out of the car and walked back across the road to the overpass rail. She tossed her cigarette down onto I-95 and watched it land on the road below. She watched as it rolled along the black top, drifting on the road, alone.

She heard Carl coming down the road before she could see him. His silver SUV emerged from the weeping fig trees that lined Sunrise Boulevard and then, just as quickly, he was pulling up behind her car. He shut the engine off and got out. Marley could tell by the look on his face that he was as weirded out by this as she was. Clearly he had done what she told him. He was wearing jeans and a clean white tee shirt and his Birkenstock sandals. And, he hadn't taken a shower yet.

“What the hell’s going on?” he said as he moved across the asphalt toward her.

“I don’t know,” she said quietly.  

He came to stand beside her. “Something’s happened, Carl. I don’t know what, but something has happened. Something really bad.”

They stood together on the overpass, looking down onto the eight lane highway which was usually bumper-to-bumper at this hour. “Have you been smoking?” he asked.

“Carl. Who cares? There’s no one here but me. And, you.”

“I thought you quit.”

“Carl! Pay attention!” She got so frustrated with him because he always focused on the wrong thing.  “Where are all the people? Huh?  Where are the cars with people in them, Carl?” She spread her arms and turned from side to side to get him to look around.

He looked puzzled, just as he looked when he saw her playing with her dolls. She looked up into his face, forcing him to look at her. “Where did they go?”

Carl walked away from her, back toward his car. “I’m going home,” he said, and got into his car, backing up to pull around her vehicle. She could tell by his actions that he was pissed. He always got pissed when he thought she’d been smoking.  As she walked back onto the road towards her own car, he made a u-turn at the signal, swerved around her in the middle of the road and sped down the road heading east, disappearing into the weeping figs lining the road. 

Marley got into her car and followed Carl's path. As she made the u-turn to go back east, she felt it in her gut. Things have changed. And, this isn’t a dream.

Friday, June 15, 2012

Fine & Dandy!

Here's hoping you have a fine and dandy weekend!

Wishing fathers everywhere a day of love and hugs and kisses, too! I miss my dad, even though he's been gone since I was 20 years old. I think there are a few people in this life we never stop missing when they're gone ...

So, if your dad is still a part of your life, cherish every day you have with him. It's a gift.

Monday, June 4, 2012

Wilhelmina's 30+ Model Search

One of my Pinterest boards is titled "How To Age Gracefully." The added copy reads: "In our world of scientific discovery, we now know there are things we can do to be fit and healthy until we're a hundred-plus years old. Sadly, our culture doesn't yet embrace the wisdom and beauty of age. I've decided to help change that. That's what this board is all about."

I cannot begin to tell you what a challenge it is to find ways to shape the public's perception of aging. As a "baby boomer," I know I am accompanied by a large number of women who have successful careers, are healthy and physically fit, and who have accomplished many things in their lifetimes. The roles women of our generation have played are varied, to say the least. They have played the roles of wife, mother, professional, public servant, elected official, volunteer and artist, to name just a few, and, in some cases, these women have had more than one career. I'm a good example of that last one. I'm on career number three!

So, there I am with my 'aging gracefully' pin board, trying to find images AND content to convey how cool it really is to be older than 40 (and, it IS cooler!) and an e-mail from Wilhelmina's Model Agency lands in my mailbox touting the "30+ Model Search." I went to the web site to take a look, and decided to vote for Isa A., age 65, pictured here.

She says, when asked "why" she wants the job: "I would love the opportunity to model for Wilhelmina to show all the up-and-coming baby boomers how great it is to be comfortable in one's skin at a later age, and how wonderful it can be to keep reinventing ourselves. We CAN stay healthy, sexy, intelligent, and confident, all with a great attitude."

Her words got my vote as much as her looks did. However, I do have a beef with Wilhelmina's Model Agency. As I paged through the 30 "semi-finalists," it seemed that the majority of them were 30-something. So. I counted. Sixteen are 30-to-39. Seven are 40-to-49. Five are in their fifties. Two, including Isa A., are in their 60s. Isa is the oldest, although I didn't know that when I voted for her. I like her style and she spoke to my generation, which is what I thought this was all about. Clearly, I was wrong.

To put women in their thirties and forties next to women in their fifties and sixties is not a good comparison. They are in two very different life stages. I can hear you out there, asking how the heck I know this! Because .... because, I have been those other ages and I remember very clearly where I was at 34 or 45 ...
Age 34

Age 45
Age 52













Age 60
For one thing, I was still wearing a bikini. Right up to my 55th birthday!

Then menopause arrived, as it is prone to do to women of a "certain age."

And, I'm thinking that this is where the rub comes in.

Hormones dictate so much in the lives of women. As adolescents entering puberty, our hormones are raging and all we can think about is how we look and what boys (and, other girls) think of us.

Around the late 20s and early 30s, we begin to stabilize and become focused on things like career and/or family. And, we pretty much stay stable until sometime in our late 40s and early 50s when we move into the menopause phase. (Which, by the way, is much like adolescence, occurring over a period of years!)

Finally, we get to what I affectionately refer to as the "Fuck You Fifties," because it is here, at this point in life, that we begin to accept ourselves and become truly comfortable in our own skin. And, it's not like we have a choice in the matter! Aging is something all of us must do.




Our mothers aged differently than we are doing. As "boomers," we have had the advantages of good nutrition and medical research, and we have reaped the benefits of multiple fitness programs. Whether you walk, swim, ride a bike, dance or hike, you've got to keep moving! Use it or lose it is really, truly true. Using our bodies is what keeps us youthful, in more ways than one!

I take issue with Wilhelmina's 30+ Model Search. Like the MORE Magazine Beauty Searches of years past, it was all about helping us to like ourselves once we moved past 40 years old. The fifties have been a mish-mash of media trying to adjust to women who won't go away, who still participate in all that life has to offer. Today, 10,000 "baby boomers" reaches 65 every day! EVERY SINGLE DAY for the next 19 years! So we are definitely a force to be reckoned with! (Marketers, pay attention!) And, I truly believe it is up to us to change the perceptions of aging we share in this culture we live in ~ to shape it so that younger women can see that there is so much to look forward to. Life is not over at 30. Or 40. Or 50! It's just beginning.

Like Isa said, "We CAN stay healthy, sexy, intelligent and confident, all with great attitude!" I don't know how to get that message to Wilhelmina's Model Agency unless I can scream it from the rooftops of New York City! Or, maybe, just here on my little blog and on my Pinterest "How To Age Gracefully" pin board. If you share my feelings on this subject, please! Chime in! Share! It's OK to age. It happens to all of us. We're not finished yet. So, don't act like we are!

Friday, June 1, 2012

What's good for the soul?

Whatever you do with your weekend, have a little fun! It's good for the soul!

Wednesday, May 30, 2012

I Got Paid To Get A Flu Shot

I'm one of the lucky ones. I have a job that provides health care insurance, and, as we all know, there's a huge battle raging among the politicians over the issue of accessible and affordable health care. My health insurance company is now called Florida Blue, formerly Blue Cross/Blue Shield of Florida. Over the past five years, I have noticed subtle changes from year to year that have brought health care to be more about preventive care and less about healing you once you get sick. I think you'll agree that it's a lot cheaper to prevent a person from getting sick than to provide medical care, pharmaceutical drugs and, in some cases, hospitalization after they fall ill.

So, last October I received a notice from my health care provider that if I got a flu shot at Walgreen's or CVS Pharmacy I would receive a $25 Visa Debit Card to spend any way I like. I found that to be a darned good incentive for getting a flue shot! Shortly after receiving the notice I stopped off at Walgreen's and got that flu shot. It took every bit of 20 minutes from start to finish. I got the band-aid on my arm at the injection site and a heart sticker for my shirt! And, honestly? That was the last time I thought about it.

Until January, when I got my $25 Visa Debit Card in the mail! I've been carrying it around in my wallet and one day, soon, I'll be spending it. Probably on that beautiful pink Michael Kors bag I've been lusting after ...

Here we are at the end of May, and, one would think the flu season is over. But, it's not. 75% of the people in my office have been out with a bad-ass flu for the past week. I, on the other hand, feel fine. {Knock on wood!} The people who have been or are sick with flu-like symptoms did NOT get a flu shot. They pooh-poohed me when I shared the offer from our health care provider ~ they had each received the same thing in the mail. They pooh-poohed me again in January when I announced I'd received my $25 Visa Debit Card. I'm thinking they're not pooh-poohing me now as they lay suffering on their sofas with the flu, missing out on life.

I can hear you now, asking, "And, your point is?"

My point is, get the flu shot. The Center for Disease Control has a comprehensive web site with answers to any question you might have about flu shots here. And, the research to support the effectiveness of flu shots is voluminous! Flu shots prevent people from getting the flu. I ask you: who needs fever, body aches, chills and sweats, nausea and vomiting, and all the complications that can occur as a result of the flu? I won't mention the 3,300 to 49,000 deaths that occur each year in the United States, though. I wouldn't want to scare you. However, flu CAN cause complications that result in death, so, why not get a flu shot? If you don't have health insurance, they are offered free of charge at the beginning of the flu season (October) or for as little as $25. I've decided I'll get it even if I have to pay for it. I really do think it's cheaper in the long run. Don't you?

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Animal Cruelty

I discovered this picture on Tumblr yesterday. I was so disturbed by it that I downloaded it so I could study it more closely. I know that mice and rats are intelligent, but I have to ask: is this real? And, if it is real, who taught the mouse how to hold onto the swing? And, is this the right thing to do?

I am a regular donor to the Humane Society of the United States because they fight animal cruelty on so many levels. I came to HSUS because of the Canadian seal slaughter each spring ... an issue that HSUS has worked diligently to end. Then, I learned about the other work that they do. Rescuing animals from hoarding situations (dogs, cats, birds, exotics, etc.) and finding them new homes. Lobbying for legislation to put regulations in place for puppy mills, as puppy mill owners are among the worst abusers of animals I have heard about, breeding dogs to make money, with no regard for humane treatment of the animals. There's the dog fighting and cock fighting ~ issues that HSUS has achieved success with recently. And, the treatment of farm animals ... chickens, pigs and cows ... working with professional farmers and legislators to bring about compromise for the humane treatment of animals that we use for food.

So, back to the mouse in the swing ... is this cruel?

I cannot say for sure. There's no question that it is a startling and adorable photograph, but I wonder about the little mouse. His eyes are dilated and his ears are tucked down. In most animals, this is a sign of distress. So, I ask you: is this a good thing?

I say, "Poor little mouse." And, I wonder what is wrong with the person who took the picture ...

Thursday, May 10, 2012

One Picture = 1,000 Words

Now, looking at this just makes you smile, doesn't it?
And, this one? Makes you smile. Right?
What would YOU think if you found a baby deer on your bed?
There's nothing cuter than baby ducks. And, when you're working so hard
to get your ducks in a row, an image like this can be a visual inspiration.

I have been social networking the past month or so, and not much blogging. Work's sort of had me in a vise grip, too, what with Earth Day and me being an environmental educator.

So, while I'm still musing on what to write about here, I'll leave you with some pleasant images to evoke a smile. I read somewhere that just looking at pictures of kittens can lower your blood pressure. I don't know if it's true, but it's a terrific idea!